While I was in it, especially in the last year, I knew life was hard but I thought I was dealing with it ok. If you had asked me, “how are you doing?” I would have probably say “ok” or “good” and I truly believed that. The funny thing I thought I was carrying it well and that I was fooling the people around me.
I realized that I never did an introduction blog post about me. So here it is; along with an announcement about some changes that are coming to the blog.
My name is Marilyn. I am the creator of this blog and Marlo & Co.
My feelings in the last year, I think for the most part have been nonexistent/numb to keep status quo or there has been sadness as I process things that had happened or that were going on inside of me. Don’t get me wrong, I have had moments of joy and when they happen I try to take note of them.
But through this all I still struggled with myself and the direction that God has called me to. I struggled with myself because I love my career in social work and the community I work in. And I love visual storytelling and photography especially with elderly. There was this tension between the two because I felt that if I leave social work I am leaving a career that I have built and love for over 10 years. And I was letting myself and others around me down by leaving social work. But I knew that if I did not see where my business might go that I was going to regret that and I could not live with that.
I didn’t know exactly what I was getting into when I started working in social services. You see I kinda stumbled on this field. When I was in college, I started out as a business management major. I loved business and still do to this day but it didn’t feel like the right fit. I met with a career advisor at my college and I was asked “Would you rather work with people or numbers?”
And I almost wore this jaded filter as a badge of honor. I thought it was okay to view my clients that I worked with through this jaded filter. In some ways, I thought I was being wise when I looked at my clients with this jaded filter. I remember telling a coworker that I can tell she is early on in her career because of the hope and optimism that she has in a situation with a client.